Billy Davies’ losses blamed for transfer embargo

Nottingham Forest, who are facing the prospect of a transfer embargo for breaching Financial Fair Play rules, have released a list of losses incurred during the 2013/14 season.

The FFP regulations allow Championship clubs to operate within certain loss thresholds, but Forest – while under the management of Billy Davies – allegedly exceeded those limits and could now be prevented from signing new players in the January transfer window.

Speaking exclusively to LTLF, recently appointed club CEO Paul Faulkner said: “Obviously I am alarmed at this latest development, so the first thing I did when I heard about the possible FFP penalties was to review what happened under the last manager.

“What I found was quite shocking. It is quite clear that the total of what Billy Davies lost during the course of the 2013/14 campaign goes way beyond what might be considered ‘fair play’.”

Mr Faulkner has shared his findings with LTLF and we print them here in full:

Things Billy Davies lost last season

• Two cup ties
• Eight league games
• The race for the play-offs
• Numerous players to injury
• His patience with the media
• The respect of the dressing room
• A disciplinary hearing
• His rag with a photographer
• A ‘pork pie race’ with Neil Moxley
• The knack
• His marbles
• The plot
• Pride
• Decency
• Most of his fans
• The support of the chairman
• His professional reputation
• His job

As readers will note, this extensive list of losses is completely non-sustainable in the modern footballing world.

However, rumours have sprung up suggesting that this transfer embargo has in fact been concocted by Billy Davies himself as his last act of revenge on the Nottinghamshire press.

Billy is reported to have been overheard telling a friend: “Ha! Let’s see what the Nottingham Post write about this January with no transfers happening at the City Ground.

“They’ll have to keep setting fire to local buildings in order to have some news to print!”

LTLF, however, believes this rumour to be false for the simple fact it is so unlikely that Billy Davies has any friends left.